Where Chocolate Strawberries Come From

Imagine some fruitcake farmer mushing up straw into little hearts and spray-painting them berry red. Then he rolls them in paddies from his chocolate cows. He lets the mess coagulate, then plops them in paper white shells. He drops 12 of them at a time into a red box and ties it with a ribbon. He makes his entire yearly income every Valentine’s Day and smiles, knowing he’s fooled us again with poop-covered red straw.

published in Scuzzbucket